![]() Positive self-talk plays an important role, especially during adverse situations. “A proven way to improve your emotional wellness – especially when you’re feeling defeated – is to accept these feelings instead of suppressing them.”ĭr Neff recommends practising self-compassion by treating oneself as they’d treat a friend. According to Dr Kristin Neff, the psychologist who first created a scale to measure self-compassion as a construct, humans often mistakenly assume that compassion towards self induces weakness and has an adverse impact on our goals and productivity. Most of us readily extend kindness and warmth to others in their times of hardship yet fail to do the same with ourselves when we’re feeling defeated. Self-compassion: imagine what you’d say to a friend A study by Frank Bond from the Goldsmiths University London revealed that emotional agility can help ease stress, improve accuracy and boost innovation and creativity in individuals.Ģ. It means accepting feelings in a compassionate manner, without getting derailed or overwhelmed by them. Indeed, a proven way to improve your emotional wellness – especially when you’re feeling defeated – is to accept these feelings instead of suppressing or avoiding them, and consciously channel them in a productive and beneficial manner, thus developing emotional agility.īeing emotionally agile implies one’s ability to sit with their feelings and thoughts, be they positive (for example, joy, hope, serenity) or negative (fear, anger, sadness). In fact, being aware of your thoughts and labelling your emotions can improve your ability to manage negative emotional experiences, according to a 2007 study by Lieberman et al. It’s important to lean into your feelings periodically and acknowledge to yourself that you are an ‘emotional creature’. So, here are nine ways you can take back power and move forward when you are feeling defeated. While some of the following ideas may offer instant results in terms of elevated mood and alleviated stress levels, the others require more consistent efforts over a longer duration of time. When you’re feeling defeated it is essential to prevail and resume your power.įeeling defeated: 9 ways to take back powerĪlthough this may seem unimaginable when you’re feeling defeated, it is possible to overcome this terrible feeling and to reclaim your power. Indeed, if we give up without trying to push beyond our embarrassments or fear of failure, we’d never know what lies outside of our comfort zone and what we could truly achieve. “If you want light to come into your life, you need to stand where it is shining,” stated Guy Finley, the renowned philosopher and self-help writer. ![]() RELATED: Sailing the world – 5 lessons I've learned The result? I passed the final grade with scholastic distinction. Consequently, this realization enabled me to excel in my academic subjects as I tried harder and broadened my understanding of the subjects. That we are not defined by our failures and defeats, but how we spring back, and the experiences we gather from these setbacks. For someone who belongs to a family of academics, being an under-performer was a subject of great humiliation and embarrassment for me and my parents, not to mention the high cost of education itself.įeeling defeated? Break free from the shackles of fearĪlthough I did have to take a re-exam for three subjects, it was actually this setback that helped me realize one of the greatest life lessons of my life. No matter how hard I tried, the concepts seemed to elude my grasp and it looked like I’d have to repeat a year. I found myself at the end of my wits during my college years, when I realized the complexity of engineering, which my parents had pressurized me to pursue. Life is called the school of hard knocks for a reason, after all. ![]() ![]() You may flunk an important exam or interview, a fight may ensue with a best friend who misunderstood your well-intended remark, or your boss may pass up what seemed like a brilliant idea in favor of a seemingly ridiculous suggestion by your colleague. Indeed, all of us find ourselves feeling defeated by life at some point. No matter how meticulously we plan things or try to predict every outcome, the possibility of failures and disappointment in life cannot be entirely ruled out. Is it possible to look at challenges and failures as the foundation to personal growth and excellence? Sonia Vadlamani explains why it’s OK to fail sometimes and how to claim back power when you’re feeling defeated by life.Īlthough there are few certainties in this existence, unfortunately we do know this: life can defeat us sometimes. ![]()
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